Love and Logic Days #22, 23, & 24

Day 22

"Highly skilled teachers get kids to attempt difficult things. Then, this wonderful transfer effect takes place and the kid says, 'I wonder what ELSE I can do!'"

Love your kids? Remember to let your face know

"I'll know you are ready for ______ when you are being really responsible in other areas."

"Kids learn better from mistakes when we stay quiet and let the consequence be the 'bad guy'."

When we set limits for kids, they can get angry for a while.
When we DON"T set limits for kids, they can stay angry for a lifetime.

"I am my kids' leader - NOT their unlimited service provider."

"Love and Logic techniques help me figure out what I CAN control instead of what I WISH I could control."

"This year, I will spend more time playing WITH my kids than shopping for them."

Day 23

"When I feel like yelling, I'm going to whisper."

 

"I cannot make the roads perfectly smooth for my kids.
But, I CAN prepare them to handle rough roads."

"I love you enough to set limits and tell you 'no'."

"I have learned that a small change in MY behavior can make a big difference."

[Parent asks child who has caused a problem]:"What do you think you need to do?"
[Child responds]: "Say sorry?"
[Adult responds]: "That's a great START."
[Child gets the gift of thinking about some logical solutions].

"Slow down... enjoy... and remember what it's all about."

Day 24

Pampered children seldom grow up to lead happy lives.

Parents who pamper their children steal away their child’s ability to achieve through struggle.

Never allow children to make decisions that affect others.

Never allow children to make a decision unless you are willing o allow them to live with the consequences of that decision.

Love and Logic Day #21

Day 21

 

No parent should put up with bad behavior. Allowing kids to misbehave is very damaging to them. They think they are incapable of controlling themselves.

Children whose parents provide no limits or controls become very insecure. 

Just because a child cries or has a fit doesn’t mean that parents are wrong or needs to give in.

No rewards come to parents who are not willing to pay the price.  Stand firm in the consequences of your child’s actions that you have given.

It is never too late to change a behavior pattern.

Make your words Gold not Garbage.

Never tell a child to do something unless you intend to follow through.

When child refuses to obey, take them by the hand to another location, lower your voice and tell them that that is enough, and what you expect them to do.  Then say, do you think it would be wise for you to continue acting that way?  Get back in there and show me that you can behave.  Thank you!

When you can’t think of a consequence for their behavior right away, tell them you’ll let them know later what you are going to do about it.

Always follow through with the consequences you set forth. 

No-Bake Blueberry Cheesecake

8 oz. Fat Free cream cheese
1 cup confectioners sugar
1 tsp. vanilla
8 oz. Fat Free cool whip
10 oz. blueberry pie filling
Low Fat Graham Cracker Crust

Beat together cream cheese, sugar & vanilla.
Fold in cool whip.
Spoon filling into prepared pie crust.
Spread blueberry topping on top.
Refrigerate for 2 hours or until chilled.

http://delicious-pie.tumblr.com/post/53363244107/nobake-blueberry-cheesecake-8-oz-cream-cheese-1-cup

Apple Cider Baked Donuts

Ingredients:
For the Apple Cider Baked Donuts:
1 cup and 2 tablespoons unbleached all-purpose flour
1-1/2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1 large egg,  at room temperature
1/2 cup fresh apple cider
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon apple cider vinegar
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
4 tablespoons Fat Free vanilla chobani yogurt or unsalted butter
For the Maple Glaze:
1-1/4 cups confectioner’s sugar3 tablespoons pure maple syrup
1 tablespoon dark corn syrup or Karo
1/2 tablespoon water
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon maple flavoring (optional)
                                  
Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 º F (177 º C).

2. In a medium mixing bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, and cinnamon.  In a small separate bowl, whisk the egg.  Set both aside.

3. In a small saucepan over medium-low heat, combine the apple cider, sugar and yogurt or butter, stirring continuously until yogurt or butter has just melted.  Remove from heat, let cool for 2 minutes, and stir in the apple cider vinegar, vanilla, and whisked egg. Slowly pour the wet ingredients into the dry; stir well with a whisker until combined and almost no lumps are visible.

4. Using a tablespoon or a cookie scooper, spoon/scoop batter into a cooking sprayed donut pan (3/4 full).  Bake in the oven for 12-14 minutes (standard-size baked donuts) or for 6-7 minutes (mini baked donuts), or until light brown and cooked through. Let cool for 2-3 minutes on a rack.  Then, remove baked donuts from pan and place them directly on a rack to cool completely before dipping into glaze.

5. For the Maple Glaze: Whisk everything together in a small bowl until smooth.  Set rack of donuts over a baking sheet lined with parchment paper.  Dip the top of the baked donuts into the maple glaze, turning to coat well.  Let baked donuts rest on rack until glaze sets.

 

Note:  Apple Cider Baked Donuts recipe adapted from We Heart Vegan,  and Maple Glaze adapted from Under The High Chair.

http://www.frombraziltoyou.org/apple-cider-baked-donuts-maple-glaze/

Classic Spritz Cookies

 

Ingredients

• 3 1/2 cups unbleached flour
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 1 1/2 cups unsalted butter softened
• 1 cup granulated sugar
• 1 egg
• 2 tablespoons Fat Free milk
• 1 teaspoon clear vanilla extract
• 1/2 teaspoon no-color almond extract
        

Makes

7-8 dozen cookies.

Tools

• Cookie Press 

Instructions:

Step 1

Preheat oven to 350ºF.

Step 2

In bowl, combine flour and baking powder. In large bowl, beat butter and sugar with electric mixer until light and fluffy. Add egg, milk, vanilla and almond extract; mix well. Gradually add  flour mixture to butter  mixture; beat until combined. Do not chill. Fill cookie press with dough and with desired disks, press cookies onto ungreased cookie sheet.

Step 3

Bake 10-12 minutes or until edges are light golden brown. Cool 2 minutes on cookie sheet on cooling rack. Remove from sheet; cool completely.

http://www.wilton.com/recipe/Classic-Spritz-Cookies

Love and Logic Day #20

Day 20

We want kids THINKING about and owning their problems. Often, it's a matter of ASKING them what they are going to do about it instead of TELLING them.

Stay classy... when there is a conflict. That way, your kids will see how to stay classy when there is a conflict.

"If you don't clean up, I'm not taking you." can become:
"I'll take you as soon as you clean up."

Celebrate you kids' successes - big and small.

We know that giving kids everything they want is bad for them.

Expecting kids to work & earn things they desire sends messages that they are capable and will enhance self-concept.

"We could change the world if we all intentionally modeled for our children the constant value of helping others."
~ Unknown

Too much rescuing sends messages that say, "You are fragile and need to be rescued."

"Today, my kids are going to help. They will contribute even if they complain at 1st and even if they don't do things exactly like I do."

"I tend to do extra things for people who treat me with respect."

Some of the most powerful messages in the world have little to do with the actual words spoken.

 

Frozen Peanut Butter Pie

 

Ingredients:

1 (9"/23 cm) chocolate crunch crust* or ready-made chocolate crumb crust
1 pkg (250 g) Fat Free cream cheese, softened
1 can (300 mL) Fat Free Eagle Brand® sweetened condensed milk
3/4 cup (175 mL) Reduced Fat smooth peanut butter
2 tbsp (30 mL) lemon juice
1 tsp (5 mL) vanilla extract
1 cup (250 mL) whipping cream, whipped
Chocolate fudge ice cream topping

Preparation:

1.  In large mixer bowl, beat cheese until fluffy; gradually beat in Eagle Brand then peanut butter until smooth.
2.  Stir in lemon juice and vanilla. Fold in whipped cream.
3.  Pour into prepared crust. Drizzle topping over pie. Freeze 4 hours or until firm.

Notes:
*Chocolate Crunch Crust: 1. In heavy saucepan, over low heat, melt 1/3 cup (75 mL) unsalted butter and 1 pkg (175 g) semi-sweet chocolate chips. 2. Remove from heat; gently stir in 2½ cups (625 mL) toasted rice cereal until completely coated. Press onto bottom and up sides of cooking sprayed 9" (23 cm) pie plate. Chill 30 minutes.
  http://www.eaglebrand.ca/recipes-details.aspx?rid=1614
 

Spiced Walnut Brittle

Ingredients

1 Cup Sugar
1/2 Cup light corn syrup
1 Cup coarsely chopped walnuts
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon          
1 teaspoon unsalted butter
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon baking soda
                                   

                                                

 Steps

1.  MICROWAVE DIRECTIONS: Spray cookie sheet. In 8-cup microwave-safe measuring cup or medium microwave-safe bowl, combine sugar and corn syrup; mix well. Microwave on HIGH for 4 minutes.

2.  Stir; microwave on HIGH for 3 to 5 minutes or until light brown.

3.  Stir in walnuts, cinnamon, butter and vanilla until well blended. Microwave on HIGH for 1 minute.

4.  Add baking soda; stir until light and foamy. Pour onto buttered cookie sheet. Cool 30 minutes or until hardened.

5.  Break brittle into pieces. Store in tightly covered container.

www.pillsbury.com/recipes/spiced-walnut-brittle/e8dc4678-564a-49a8-981f-9928ab959f8f               

Love and Logic Day #19

Day 19

“Love you [pause] too much to fight about this."
~Said lovingly, but without a lot of emotional energy

 

Safe driving responsibility on teens shoulders.  Financial responsibility. 

Never buy your teen a car. 

Teens pay insurance, gas, wear and tear on car.

Have teen call insurance agents. 

Teens leave a cash deposit of the amount of the deductible for your insurance if driving your car. 

Never pay for a teens ticket. 

Be firm about driving under the influence. 

 

Don’t inconvenience Mom when she’s on the phone.

Mom is the most important person in the house.

When children inconvenience you on the phone they get to do the chores you would normally do, since they took your time and energy away from your personal time.  If children inconvenience you on the phone, ask the person on the phone to hold, have children wait while you are on the phone in their room or in the family room.  When you are done, then have them pay you back by doing extra chores.

Helping An Investigator

I am currently helping an investigator stop drinking and smoking, and we ate some elk meat which tasted so good.  Other than that not much.

 

Elder Rumsey

Love and Logic Day #18

Day 18

My kids will face challenges. I will empower, not enable.

"The struggle my child faces today can become the strength my child possesses tomorrow."

Potty training doesn’t have to be a frustrating experience for either you or your child. The most important things to remember are:

·           Little children copy what they see their parents doing. That’s why it’s so important to let your tots see you using the potty…and having a good time doing so. (While this may be a bit embarrassing for some, the results are well worth the discomfort.)

·           Offer lots of choices.  For example “Do you want to use the upstairs potty or downstairs potty?” “Do you want to bring your favorite toy or leave it in your room?” The more small choices we give, the less resistant our kids will be.

·           Remain calm and empathetic when accidents happen. Punishment never works when it comes to potty training.

·           Allow your child to train at their own pace. Some kids are ready before they are two years old, others aren’t ready until they are around four. When we try to force the issue before our children are ready, frustration is all we will achieve.

 

Do your part to fight RDD (Responsibility Deficit Disorder).

Lemon Bars

Ingredients:

• 1 box of Angel Food Cake
• 1 22 oz can of lemon pie filling (or 1 jar of lemon spread)

 

Instructions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 F degrees. Line a deep 9x13 inch baking pan with parchment paper.
2. In a large bowl, empty the contents of the box of angel food cake and to it add the lemon pie filling. Whisk it until it's well incorporated, you'll notice it start to foam a bit.
3. Pour the batter in the baking pan and bake for 30 to 40 minutes. I baked mine closer to 40 minutes, at 30 minutes it was not yet done.

Notes

You will want to use a very deep baking pan here, or at least cut the parchment paper so that it comes up the sides of the pan, so that the cake batter doesn't spill as it bakes.

 

http://www.jocooks.com/bakery/cakes/two-ingredient-fat-free-lemon-bars/

Love and Logic Day #17

Day 17

Adult children living at home and not respecting rules, doesn’t clean up after himself, lounges around and doesn’t help out, no job.  You wouldn’t let anyone but your child treat you like this.  Take away their free ride.  They may hate or dislike you at first, but one day they will thank you for helping him out.

 

Provide adult child with a “Good Neighbor Policy”.  Writing a letter allows the child time to think, and make the decision of how he wants to behave, and where he wants to live.  The good neighbor policy is a letter stating that you will treat your child as if he was a neighbor or friend staying with you for a short term.  Your expectations are in the letter as well. 

 

An enforceable statement tells the child how you are going to run your life instead of telling him how to run his life.   Such as for allowance, when the child runs out and comes to you for more, you could say, I’m sorry, I’m out of money.  I’ll be giving you more on Saturday, as usual.  When the child claims it’s not fair, say I know.  As the child continues to complain continue to say, I know.   

 

The benefits of doing the right thing aren't always visible immediately.

Gingerbread-Caramel Bars

 

What You Need

1 pkg.  (2-layer size) spice cake mix

2 tsp.  ground ginger

1/2 cup Fat Free Vanilla Chobani Yogurt

1  egg

35  KRAFT Caramels

1 can  (5 oz.) Fat Free evaporated milk

1 pkg.  (4 oz.) BAKER'S White Chocolate, coarsely chopped, divided

Make It

HEAT oven to 350ºF.
LINE 13x9-inch pan with foil, with ends of foil extending over sides; spray with cooking spray. Beat cake mix, ginger, yogurt and egg with mixer until blended. (Dough will be stiff.) Press 2/3 of the dough onto bottom of prepared pan.
BAKE 10 to 12 min. or until lightly browned. Meanwhile, microwave caramels and milk in microwaveable bowl on HIGH 3 to 3-1/2 min. or until caramels are completely melted and sauce is well blended, stirring after each minute.
DRIZZLE caramel sauce over baked layer in pan. Reserve 2 Tbsp. chopped chocolate; sprinkle remaining over caramel sauce. Crumble remaining gingerbread dough over dessert. Bake 25 to 30 min. or until center is almost set. Cool completely.
MICROWAVE reserved chocolate in microwaveable bowl on HIGH 30 sec. to 1 min. or until completely melted, stirring every 30 sec.; drizzle over dessert. Let stand until chocolate is firm. Use foil handles to lift dessert from pan before cutting into bars.

Kraft Kitchens Tips

How to Neatly Cut Dessert Bars

When cutting dessert bars, carefully wipe off the knife blade between cuts with a clean damp towel. This prevents the filling from building up on the blade, ensuring clean cuts that leave the edges of the cut bars intact.

 

http://www.kraftrecipes.com/recipes/gingerbread-caramel-bars-155230.aspx

Love and Logic Day #16

 

Day 16

"I try to let my kids seeing me treating others with kindness and compassion every day."

 

Matching Funds:  When your child desires to have a really expensive item, you give them a set amount that you will pay after they have earned the rest of the money they need. 

 

Children who solve their own problems have more self-respect than children who don’t. 

Provide some choices for the child, instead of just one solution, if they ask for your advice. 

 

Don’t pay for good grades or punish for bad ones.  This only causes a power struggle.

Chewy Chocolate-Peanut Butter Bars

 

What You Need

1 cup unbleached flour

3/ 4 cup  quick-cooking oats

1/2 tsp.  baking soda

1/2 cup  Fat Free Vanilla Chobani Yogurt

3/4 cup Low Fat Creamy Peanut Butter

1/ 3 cup  packed brown sugar

1/3 cup  granulated sugar

1  egg

1 tsp.  vanilla

1 pkg.  (4 oz.) BAKER'S Semi-Sweet Chocolate, chopped

1/2 cup  dried cranberries

Make It

HEAT oven to 350ºF.
LINE 13x9-inch pan with foil, with ends of foil extending over sides; spray with cooking spray. Mix flour, oats and baking soda until blended.
BEAT yogurt, peanut butter and sugars in large bowl with mixer until light and fluffy. Add egg and vanilla; mix well. Gradually add flour mixture, mixing well after each addition. Stir in chocolate and cranberries; gently press onto bottom of prepared pan.
BAKE 20 to 22 min. or until center is set. Cool completely. Use foil handles to lift dessert from pan before cutting into bars.

http://www.kraftrecipes.com/recipes/chewy-chocolate-peanut-butter-bars-155243.aspx

 

Love and Logic Day #15

Day 15

Struggle is a way kids get stronger. Hope for some healthy struggle today.

Keep your 'credit score' high with your kids - say things that come true while avoiding empty promises, warnings and threats.

 

Parents do not need to react immediately or have all the answers on the spot.  A more effective approach is to delay dealing with a problem as long as the child knows something is going to happen.

 

Deliver consequences when you are well prepared and calm. 

 

When possible deal with problems when they are not taking place.  Tell the child you are not sure what to do about this, but that you will get back to them.

 

Don’t abandon common sense.  Some situations require immediate response for safety reasons. 

 

Hard work, struggle, be respectful, and personal responsibility.  

 

Expect children as young as six to do at least 20 minutes of chores each day.

Expect chores done by the end of each day.  Do not remind them about chores.  If a child goes to bed and has not done his chores, let him sleep for 30 to 45 minutes then wake him and tell him the end of the day is near, and he is to get up and finish his work.  Don’t take “no” for an answer.

 

Love and Logic Day #14

Day 14

Four Steps to Responsibility

Give the child a task she can handle.

Hope that the child “blows” it.

Let equal parts of empathy and consequence do the teaching.

Give the same task again.

 

Turning Bad Decisions into Wisdom.

There are many different ways to make our children carry the lion’s share of the thinking.

Many different ways to force decision-making. 

Many unique and creative ways to express genuine sadness for children who make mistakes.

 

Say things with genuine compassion and understanding.  Hold child’s hand, or place you hand on their shoulder.  This greatly increases the effectiveness of what you have said.

 

Child: 

It’s not fair!

That’s stupid

My friends don’t have to do that

This sucks

I don’t care

All the other kids get to

You’re just using that love and logic stuff again

Where’s that nice mother I used to have

I hate you

You don’t love me

Everybody else gets to do it

I’m not doing it, and you can’t make me

Why do I have to

I’m the  only one who ever has to

But I don’t need my coat

But I don’t like this kind of food

It’s not my fault.  The teacher just doesn’t like me

You’re so old-fashioned

Don’t try to pull that love and logic stuff on me

We don’t have homework.  The teacher lets us do it all at school

I really need those $125.00 running shoes

If you love me, you’d let me. . .

You never. . . or You always. . .

No words but the “rolling eyes” syndrome

I don’t have to put up with this.  I’m going to live with Dad

 

Parent: 

Probably so

Could be

True

That’s a possibility

I’m afraid so

Thanks for noticing.  I’m trying to be a better parent.

Gone forever, I’m afraid.

Who knows?

Would you rather I went back to yelling and screaming

What was my old way?  I’ve forgotten

That’s sad.  But I still love you.

Do you think you’ll hate me forever, or do you think you’ll get over it?

I guess I’m kind of hard to love at times.

Do you think you’ll still hate me at dinner time?

Nice try.

What do you think I think about that

Don’t worry about it now.

There’s no hurry.  Just have it done before your next meal

That could be today, tomorrow, or Saturday.  It’s really up to you.

Take your time.  I only expect it done by the end of the day.

If you don’t understand why after you finish, I’ll be glad to explain.  

I bet it feels that way

Won’t it be exciting to find out

All the more for the rest of us

Maybe you’ll like what we have for the next meal better

That’s up to you

It must feel awful to get grades like that.  Is there any way I can help

I know how bad grades hurt, but we’ll love you regardless of the number of years it takes you to get through that grade.

Thanks for noticing

I bet that’s true

Old-fashioned parents must be a drag for you

Be sure to smile when you say that

Antiques are rare and priceless

Oh really.  What kind of stuff do you want me to pull on you

Nice try.  Bring me a note from your teacher

I’m sure your report card will tell the story on that.  Good luck

Oh, honey.  Do I look like I believe that  

Do I look like I just fell off the Stupid mom truck

I might have a hard time believing that if I said it myself

Go for it!  I’ll donate $35.00.  When you earn the rest, you’ll have them.  I can’t wait to see you wearing them.

Nice try

I bet it looks that way.  Tell me more.

 

The best response to “eye rolling” is no response, but if you must say something try this:

What are the eyes saying today, Pal?

 

I love you wherever you live

 

Never discount the child’s feelings with flippant remarks.  Say what you need to say with compassion and understanding.  Adults attitude is crucial to success.

Love and Logic Day #13

Day 13

"Let's both spend some time thinking about this and see what we come up with."

When a kid challenges your decision with a "But, why!!??", experiment with a "What do you think the reasons might be?" instead of a long justification.

Retaining your child in school can be a huge blow to their self esteem, and can leave scars that are difficult to heal. 

97% of children who avoid schoolwork have self-concept problems with emotional overlays. 

Identify the root causes of the child’s underachievement.     

Create a plan for success.  Changes in family patterns, strong cooperation between parents and teachers.  Counseling for child.  Different teaching and relationship strategies at school.

Retention scale.

Parents love children regardless of their school success.  Our children need to hear this.

Coconut-Pumpkin Pudding Pie

 

What You Need

1-1/4 cups  graham cracker crumbs

1/4 cup Unsalted butter, melted

3/4 cup  BAKER'S ANGEL FLAKE Coconut, divided

1 pkg.   (3.4 oz.) JELL-O Vanilla Flavor Instant Pudding

1/2 cup Fat Free cold milk

1 can   (15 oz.) pumpkin

1 tsp.  pumpkin pie spice

2 cups   thawed Fat Free COOL WHIP Whipped Topping, divided

Make It

HEAT oven to 350ºF.
MIX graham crumbs, butter and 1/2 cup coconut; press onto bottom and up side of 9-inch pie plate. Bake 8 to 10 min. or until lightly browned; cool completely. OR BUY A LOW FAT GRAHAM CRUST          
BEAT pudding mix, milk, pumpkin and spice in medium bowl with whisk 2 min. Stir in 1 cup COOL WHIP. Pour into crust; top with remaining COOL WHIP.
REFRIGERATE 3 hours or until firm. Meanwhile, toast remaining coconut; cool.
SPRINKLE toasted coconut over pie just before serving.

Kraft Kitchens Tips

How to Toast Coconut

Spread coconut in shallow pan. Bake in 350°F oven 5 to 7 min. or until lightly browned, stirring occasionally. Or, spread onto bottom of microwaveable pie plate. Microwave on HIGH 4 min. or until lightly browned, stirring every 2 min.

 

http://www.kraftrecipes.com/recipes/coconut-pumpkin-pudding-pie-145676.aspx

Holiday Holly Chocolate Cupcakes

 

What You Need

1 pkg.  (2-layer size) chocolate cake mix

1 pkg.  (3.9 oz.) JELL-O Chocolate Instant Pudding

1/4 cup Fat Free milk

1 container  (16 oz.) ready-to-spread vanilla (I prefer cream cheese) frosting

1 cup  thawed Fat Free COOL WHIP Whipped Topping

72  red candy-coated chocolate pieces (about 1/2 cup)

24  green gumdrop spearmint leaves, cut lengthwise in half

Make It

HEAT oven to 350°F.
PREPARE cake batter and bake as directed on package for 24 cupcakes, blending dry pudding mix and milk into batter before spooning into prepared muffin cups. Cool in pans 10 min.; remove from pans to wire racks. Cool completely.
MIX frosting and COOL WHIP until blended; spread onto cupcakes.
DECORATE with remaining ingredients to resemble holly leaves and berries.

 http://www.kraftrecipes.com/recipes/holiday-holly-chocolate-cupcakes-155229.aspx

 

 

Low-Fat Pumpkin Pie

 

Ingredients

1 (15 ounce) can solid pack pumpkin
1 (14 ounce) can fat-free sweetened condensed milk     
½ cup egg substitute
½ teaspoon ground cinnamon
½ teaspoon ground nutmeg
½ teaspoon ground ginger
1 (9 inch) unbaked pastry shell

Preparation

1. In a large mixing bowl, combine the first six ingredients; beat just until smooth. Pour into pastry shell.
2. Bake at 425 degrees for 15 minutes.
3. Reduce heat to 350 degrees and bake 25-30 minutes longer or until knife inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool on a wire rack.
4. Store in the refrigerator.

http://health.clevelandclinic.org/2012/11/recipe-low-fat-pumpkin-pie/?utm_source=pinterest&dynid=pinterest-_-cc+pins-_-social-_-social-_-low+fat+pumpkin+pie+recipes

Low Fat Oatmeal Banana Bread

Low Fat Oatmeal Banana Bread

1 1/4 cups unbleached flour

1/2 cup packed brown sugar

1/2 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1 Tbsp Vanilla Chobani Fat Free Yogurt

1 egg, beaten

2 egg whites, beaten

3 large ripened bananas

1 cup uncooked old fashioned oats

Heat the oven to 350 degrees.  Spray and flour a loaf pan and set aside.

In a large bowl, stir together the flour, brown sugar, baking soda, baking powder, cinnamon, and oats.

Mash the bananas in a smaller bowl.  Add the yogurt and whole egg and mix thoroughly.  Add the wet ingredients to the dry ingredients and mix well.

With an electric hand mixer or stand mixer, beat the egg whites until medium stiff peaks form.  Fold the egg whites into the batter in three additions.

Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake until top of loaf is firm to touch, about 45 minutes.  Remove from oven and allow to cool in pan for 5 minutes.  Flip loaf onto a wire rack and cool another 10 minutes.

source:  recipe from joy the baker

 

http://www.thelifeofawife.com/2012/04/low-fat-oatmeal-banana-bread.html?m=1

Love and Logic Days #11 & 12

Day 11

Choices are like fishing:
Make a decision for a kid, avoid a bad decision today...
Teach a kid to make good decisions, empower him/her for a lifetime.

 

Day 12

Real world lessons are remembered longer when the adult is sad and understanding, instead of angry.  Children need the opportunities to make mistakes.  They need to be allowed to live with the consequences of those mistakes.  Parents, stay out of the way long enough to let our children figure things out for themselves.  This takes faith and support. 

 

Kids have messy rooms.  They keep their rooms like most adults keep their garages.  They look at them as storage rooms, not show places.  To little space for the amount of stuff one has.  How a child keeps his room is not necessarily how he will keep his house.  How a parent keeps their house is an indicator of how a child will keep his house.  Loosen up about perfect room, and be a model by picking up after one self.  Just ask children to shut their doors when company comes.  Be reasonable. 

 

Give reasonable deadlines, instead of demanding something be done NOW!  Giving deadlines gives the parents time to come up with what they will do for those who have not complied.  Example:  Everyone who has a clean room by Saturday at 9 will get to go ice skating with us. 

 

Let the children help to customize their rooms.  They’ll take more pride in them.  When the children want more expensive things than you can afford.  Help them find a way to make up the difference.  This teaches responsibility.  Keep a list of household jobs on the fridge that the children can earn money for. 

 

One day you’ll miss those messy rooms, and the kids too!       

Love and Logic Days #9 & 10

Day 9

Giving my kids a good life does not mean removing all struggle and disappointment.

 

Some parents don’t agree on raising children.  It’s rare for two people to totally agree.  You can’t change a person.  Become a good model with your parenting skills.  Share what you’ve learned. 

 

When your child comes to you with something outrageous as a solution (in this case wanting money), such as “I’ll just have to start selling drugs”, the best thing you can say is “That’s an option”.  This will usually stop the child in her tracks, and cause them to do some serious thinking. 

 

We learn how to be parents by following our parents example.  However today children are aware of their “rights”.  They use this against parents.  Be sure to give your children choices with consequences, and always follow through with what you said you would do (the consequence) if the child chooses the lesser of the two choices.

 

Avoid telling children how to solve their problems, instead offer a menu of choices (things other kids have tried).  Then ask them to look at the possible consequences of each choice before deciding on a course of action.  The child will make a good choice and feel good, or a bad choice and gain wisdom through experience.

 

Children are mirrors of our own behavior.  They will imitate our actions, tone of voice, attitudes, values, and fears. 

 

Children will be more cooperative when they feel they have some control.  This happens when they are offered choices. 

When parents are in an emotional state is not a good time to come up with choices to give your children.

There are times when we have to either give orders or tell our children there are no choices. 

When we are constantly giving our children choices, and then we have to give an order, the children are more accepting of our order. 

 

Acceptance and Approval are two different things.      

Everyone makes mistakes.  It’s helpful for our children to be able to talk with an interested, not blaming, adult about their experiences.  Just because you listen doesn’t mean you approve of what happened.  Parents listen with curiosity, interest, and ask sincere questions. 

Parents need to be concerned about their teens plans for handling undesirable activities more than they are about restricting those activities. 

Knowing your teen can handle the adversity and temptations associated with an activity is far more important that weather the activity is good or bad.     

 

Day 10

Take good care of yourself (and your kids) by setting firm limits, in loving ways.

We can kill our children’s spirits with love and criticism.

Children who live with criticism grow up to be critical and chronically unhappy.   

Attacking, nagging, humiliation, fault-finding, ridicule, rejection, and criticism.  These cause the child to become less and less confident.  They recognize what they do wrong, instead of what they do right.  Children don’t learn by being corrected, they learn by modeling and example.  Bite your tongue when you want to tell your children what they did wrong.  Bite your tongue when you have impatient words that indicate your child does not measure up.  Focus on what your children do well.     

 

Love and Logic Day #8

Day 8

Empathy allows us to remain the 'good guy' while the child's poor decisions remain the bad guy.

It’s ok to take a firm stand on a desired behavior.  Your voice needs to sound firm, NOT angry!  Tone of voice and body language.  Demand responsible behavior.  Look your child in the eyes, stand tall, and do not tremble or quiver.

Rehearse, mentally  your new techniques before trying them out on the children. 

 

While shopping remember that we as adults touch and examine products.  Our children are trying to learn to be big, by copying adult behavior, hence the reason they touch everything in the store.  Learning through modeling.

Tell children to touch only those things that he can afford to pay for.  Spend time practicing which things touch and handle and how to handle those items.  Give positive praise when they touch and handle things properly.  Before shopping have a brief review.  Teach, practice, reinforce. 

 

It is impossible to control the thoughts and actions of another person. 

Set up situations in which the child or person decides it is best or in their best interest to do as asked, (coming to dinner for instance or waiting till breakfast to eat).   

Love and Logic Day #7

Day 7

When children threaten to move out because you won’t buy or do something for them.

“I’m not doing/buying that or anything today, but I’ll still love you, wherever you live”.

 

When child is misbehaving at the table or making a mess, “Oh, goody, meal’s over”.  They will eat for sure at the next meal. 

1.  Eat nicely and have all you want.

2.  Act out an end the meal immediately.

When children do not eat their meal and are excused, they will complain later.  Do not give in to them.  Make them wait until the next meal.  Express empathy by saying, “Yes, I get really hungry too if I don’t eat enough when I have the chance.  But don’t worry, we’ll be eating again soon.”

Make your word Gold.  Only make statements that can be enforced.  Enforceable statements say what we will allow, what we will do or what we will provide. 

Be sure to practice your techniques often.